Cause you gotta have friends

Each time we’ve met for lunch has been the best. We have enjoyed the best BLTs, with the best drinks, on the best patio, helped by the best server. Another time we had the best appetizers, the best pizza, the best drinks, on another best patio. Sprinkled in between we have visited the best wine bar, the best sports bar, and the best bistro.

Spending time with Kay makes every time the best time.

We talk, we laugh. We eat. We have shared family experiences, reflected on our pasts, have shared our political concerns, offered occasional advice, reaffirmed where appropriate, and look forward to the next time we will get together.

Kay and I, who are twenty years apart, are friends.

Kay’s daughter had asked for help transporting her mom to treatments. As one with a flexible schedule, I joined the team of several really nice ladies from Kay’s church.

But, you know what? I think I became Kay’s favorite driver.

I don’t know how it happened. We just talked. The drive was usually uneventful so covering a range of topics to and from was very easy. Many times I wished the trip would take just a little longer.

I asked about her, she asked about me. Each of us listened. After all, we had years of experiences to cover. Kay passed her treatments with flying colors. We had just begun to know each other.

Kay and I became friends.

Are we intergenerational friends? Yes. But more so, we are friends. These days we hear a lot about developing intergenerational friendships. Developing new friendships of any kind is especially good for people who may have lost close friends over the years, but being open to intergenerational friendships opens up a whole new world for people, and, it helps people to better understand our similarities.  Oftentimes suggestions are made as to how to best identify prospective friends, how to approach people, and how to grow the relationship. Are there simpler ways to develop friendships?

Perhaps it would be easier to develop intergenerational or really any friendship by being open to opportunities to meet people, to help where invited, to listen, and to keep one’s heart and mind open.

A good friend and I have a heartfelt relationship with a couple who are about 15 years ahead of us in life. We go to dinner, meet for special occasions, and celebrate with family. We talk, we listen, and do we laugh! Everything is on the table – religion, politics, life experiences, and other people. The four of us really enjoy spending time together. Ours is an easy, comfortable friendship.

So, be open to opportunities to meet people, help where invited, listen, and keep your heart and mind open. After all, you know what Bette would say…

‘Cause you gotta have friends!

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